Why Are Mothers So Stressed ?

Source 

Homeschooling has really opened my eyes to the amount of pressure 21st century mothers truly are under. Every mother  I come across looks stressed and exhausted, even those who appear to have it all under control. You can see the exhaustion when you look into their eyes, they just look drained. Sometimes I stare in the mirror and see the same blank expression that I see when I look at other mums. So why are mothers so stressed? The answer should really be obvious right? I think that a lot of the stress we experience as mothers in this day and age is actually self inflicted. Allow me to explain before you bite my head off.


Comparison
Mothers are known for it, comparing ourselves to other mothers, keeping an eye on how well other kids are doing academically. Seeing how organized your friend with 4 kids kitchen or living room is. Wondering how that woman next door with twins manages to run 2 businesses and still get her kids ready for school in the morning, drive them to school, and work non stop until 3pm and then go and pick them up. We never really focus on ourselves and all the great things we have done as mothers. We look at what we have not done, and that can cause incredible anxiety. I remember going to a friends house and seeing her neatly organized living  area, and feeling anxious because I had left my living room in a total state that afternoon. We need to stop comparing, it is hard but we need to try.

Social Media
Social media is in some way a gift and a curse because it allows us to do more comparing. We can click on one link and be propelled into the living room of a Stepford Wife, with some freshly baked cupcakes and fresh linen neatly folded in a washing basket about to be neatly folded into the linen cabinet. This can lead to instant anxiety. Especially if your linen is crumpled up in the poor excuse for an actual linen cupboard. It is possible to sit for hours looking at Instagram pictures of perfectly designed baby nurseries and wow factor kitchens and feel instantly envious of what that "model mum" has. It can make you feel like you are not doing the right thing, and that you could actually do better.

To Proud to ask For Help 
Some mothers are simply too proud to ask for help. I used to be like this, now I have no problem asking for help when I need it. Some mothers find it so hard to ask for help that they would rather muddle through on their own tearing their hair out at the roots than actually ask someone they know, and trust for help. To reduce stress, seriously just ask for help if you have someone who can help.

Putting the Kids First all the Time
It is important to make the kids a priority however, it is also important to make yourself a priority too. I have noticed that most mothers put themselves last. They even put their husbands first, and everything else first, and they come last. Is this really a realistic way of living? I think not! At some point we are going to need to put ourselves first, even just for 1 day out of the week.  I make a point of doing this on the weekend, and my sanity has actually been restored. At one point I was tearing my hair out, and I am not afraid to admit it. Now on the weekends,  I have pamper days, days where I just sleep, days where  I spend the whole day aimlessly strolling around the shops. I also have days where I take my laptop to a local cafe and drink green tea all day and  and write, write, write. Some days, I just cook my favorite things and watch movies all day.

Ladies, so next time you feel stressed and what to take a day off. Do it. (Okay I know some women do not have a choice, and they have no one to help. If this is you, when you put the kids to bed, relax for one day out of the week.)

I want to take this opportunity to congratulate all the mothers out there who try their best for their kids. Give yourselves a break once in a while, and exhale.